Labor, Liberal or National?

Markee · November 25, 2010, 7:17pm

Are you a Labor, a Liberal, or a National Voter?

Here is a little test that will help you decide.
The answer can be found by posing the following question.
You’re walking down a deserted street with your wife and two small children. Suddenly, an Islamic Terrorist with a huge knife comes around the corner, locks eyes with you, screams obscenities, praises Allah, raises the knife, and charges at you.
You are carrying a Smith & Wesson 6 shot revolver gun, and you are an expert shot. You have mere seconds before he reaches you and your family. What do you do? THINK AND READ CAREFULLY THEN SCROLL DOWN: Labor Voter’s Answer:
Well, that’s not enough information to answer the question!
Does the man look poor or oppressed?
Have I ever done anything to him that would inspire him to attack?
Could we run away? What does my wife think? What about the kids?
Could I possibly swing the gun like a club and knock the knife out of his hand? What does the law say about this situation?
Does the hand-gun have appropriate safety built into it?
Why am I carrying a loaded gun anyway, and what kind of message does this send to society and to my children?
Is it possible he’d be happy with just killing me?
Does he definitely want to kill me, or would he be content just to wound me?
If I were to grab his knees and hold on, could my family get away while he was stabbing me? Should I call 000?
Why is this street so deserted? We need to raise taxes, have community clean -up day. Can we make this a happier, healthier street that would discourage such behaviour.
I need to debate this with some friends for a few days and try to come to a consensus.
This is all so confusing!

Liberal’s Answer: BANG!

National’s Answer: BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG!
Click… (Sounds of reloading)
BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG!
Daughter: ‘Nice grouping, Daddy!’
'Were those the Winchester Copper Tips or Hollow Points?! ’
Son: ‘Can I shoot the next one?!’
Wife: 'You ain’t taking that to the Taxidermist!

heavymetal · November 25, 2010, 8:17pm

tl/dr

ts/ml

Cafe_de_Keirin · November 25, 2010, 8:23pm

Summary: Typical political joke, this time aimed at the sterotypical Labor voter’s left-leaning tendencies. Also with a nod to a National party country-hick theme. Set against a backdrop of an Islamic terrorist and personal firearms.

HeavyMetalCyclist · November 25, 2010, 10:02pm

I desire disorder.

Dxs · November 25, 2010, 10:33pm

i think what the post is saying is that labor voters like to think before they act and liberal voters are bigots?

Eitherway, in the vic election Labor and Liberal are swapping preferences… so basically are the closest two parties in the spectrum.

Captain_Commuter · November 25, 2010, 11:37pm

In my electorate, Labor is fielding a 19yo kid. If elected, it will be his first ever full-time job.

Dave_S · November 25, 2010, 11:56pm

I’d use two bullets on the dumb shit who wrote this, and four bullets on the even dumber shit that thought it’d be clever to replace the American political parties in this copypasta with Australian ones.