Letting tyres down?

Has anyone had experience with repeated tyre deflation?
What have you done about it?
My tyres have been let down for 3 days in a row now by some cowardly bastard(s) at school.
2 days at the end of last term and even after a 2 week holiday they were, sure enough, deflated at the end of today. As I’m sure you all know this is just really fucking annoying and it seems like there’s not much I can do about it.
Far fetched ideas so far are,
Filling tyres with mustard gas, pepper spray, some sort of poisonous gas etc.
Inventing valves that spray ink all over the hands of the perpetrator unless opened in a specific manner.

I do have a vague idea of the large group of perpetrators (a gang of sorts) but it is impossible to confront them all.

I’d really appreciate some ideas on how to stop this asshole(s) as it’s definitely more than annoying now.

I might have seen something similar to this once but I searched for a good 20 minutes and couldn’t find it.

Sniper Rifle, High vantage point with view of bicycle storage area, patience.

(smearing poo all over your valves might also do the trick)

Put dog shit on your valves.

Take a pump. Or go with the dogie doo on your valves-that one might come back and get you though…

Geodude: get your fuckin dad to just chill out the front of school with his 20kg hubs and his 20kg beard, and come over to them. He can just sit there with a spliff and a beer and a baseball bat, and when these punks roll over to your bike, drunky dad smacks them in the tits hard enough to scare the fuck outta them, but not crack their sternums or whatever.

I carry a pump, it gets annoying having to frequently pump em up as well. Dog shit idea could possibly work, maybe something that doesn’t involve having shit on my bike but some kind of minor nasty that deters from the valve.
I’m liking the sniping idea but I don’t think I’d get far with a rifle at school.
Violence is unfortunately not an answer as this ‘gang’ is pretty much composed of a very large amount of very large dudes.

Get fuckin ev steezy to get your back, you go to north fitz right?

Park your bike somewhere else??

Anything like dog shit or nasty stuff on your valves is asking for your tyres to be slashed / tubes punctured with needles or whatever… Maybe just let your tyres down yourself at the start of the day so when they go to do it, it’s already done. They’ll get over it soon enough.

Or next time it happens, ride off rim bashing like it aintnothang.

With very small cocks and low IQ’s no doubt.

I’d be sprinkling some agrade chilli powder over the valve opening and also cap, in the hope that some would blow up into the fuckers eyes, or at least the residue would be on his finger when he inevitably picks his nose or rubs his eye, or better stiil pulls his cock out for a whizz, or fingers his butt during masturbation, or whatever the fuck dickless meathead pack animal wankers do in private moments.

Nah Princes Hill Dylan.
I would HLC but there’s not really anywhere at school where it’s safe. It’s been in a different spot each 3 times and they were in real public parts of the school. I rimbashed it to commuter today on a brand new tyre ‘cos I forgot my pump. Swear I almost took the tyre off cornering, rimmin’ is no fun.

I like this, I like the 'tude too.

Other than the fact this is near on bullying i’d see a teacher about it. If that don’t work get us some more details via pm and we’ll sort it for you.

wrap a $20 bill around your valves they will see it and think it’s some kind of mindfuck trap and go nowhere near your bike ever again the end

Remove tires.

Ride on the rims.

we could fight them, Fixed.org vs them!

dude, those chumps are so lame
you could maybe just treat the tyre pumping as physical exercise for your upper body to even out the workout on your legs
and deflating the tyres yourself as suggested seems like a reasonable deterrent…better than trying to lay a trap with dog shit or whatever cos it’ll lead to retaliation no doubt

Blair’s 16 Million Reserve #320: Chile Mojo
Price prohibitive…may destroy you valve…though if any one touches it pretty sure they will need to visit the alfred burns unit or somesuch

this is bullying. go talk to ms healy.

Best answer.

That, and the dog shit.

Grease on the valve caps not fresh grease the grease that is in your hubs after winter, black as the ace of spades. They wont know how to get it off properly and have the signs af their tampering all over them.