$20 from a local junkyard.
Be afraid…
Mockup:
Dropouts + possible chainstay length will be chopped, to combat the oil tanker handling.
Satin black, with a subtle mention of the original graphics, polished bits.
Oh and non crap photos.
I’m posting this so you all hassle me to get it built.
Can something that far gone be saved? I’ve got an old hard rubbish find in similar shape (i.e. rusted to buggery) that I’ve been too lazy to chuck back out on the nature strip. Figured it was beyond repair but I might have to give it another look.
Interested to see more pics as your build progresses. It’s looong.
I think your fork might’ve taken an impact at some point.
I found the complete bike in the hard rubbish, although pretty much everything else was dead.
FWIW, I think chopping up the stays is a waste of time and money. Mine handles like a bus and it’s a bit scary over ~30ish km/h. I reckon that’s just the way they are. You’d be better off spending the money on a frame that does what you want it to.
After all…you can’t make a silk purse from a sow’s ear.
The frame is actually not bad - it’s just the rest of the stuff hanging off it that’s cactus.
There’s no way I’m trusting the fork, that’s gone out in the recycling already.
Snowflake, I suspect the sketchy handling stems largely from the original fork - it’s a little too tall, and has a lot of rake.
Once the front axle is too far out from the steerer’s pivot axis, things get weird very quickly.
The grey fork in the other pic is shorter and much straighter - should be more stable at speed.
Most of my time has been spent aboard mountain bikes and a few cruiser contraptions - the slacker angles don’t bother me.
As for chopping things, I have access to a mill and I’m not afraid to use it. 
Well I still think surgery is a bad idea, especially since the americans are paying plenty of money for skidstars lately 
Velographix can do a set of Skidstar decals if you want them.
If you do manage to speak to Velographix, let me know - I emailed him a brief for the Kenevans decals and Michael haven’t responded… Dunno if he’s still in the game. Also be aware that decasl are more like $50 USD, not $30 as quoted on their website.
That’s cool, I figured it wouldn’t be everyone’s cup of tea.
Cheers, I might look into that.
I have this crazy idea of clearcoating the bare frame, masking off the checkered pattern, painting and then leaving the metal showing through instead… yeah, it’ll be a lot of careful work.
Yours looks fantastic, by the way.
Have you thought about Moustache bars.
It’ll be a cruising bike I reckon!
Seatpost is jammed in the frame.
Fark.
Hmmm…
Been there…done that.
Check out Sheldon’s tips on stuck seatposts - if that doesn’t work, you could be screwed.
Try heating it up and smacking it with a mallet.