I spy with my little eye.

I had today off so I decided to go for a ride down to Altona and beyond as I’ve never really ridden out this way before.
On my ride I cought the tail end of what i’m presuming was some of the ABD riders. Some incredible sightings. About a bazillion cable ties and flouro jackets (as expected), 4 epic unicycles, 2x elderly men on bikes with their jumpers tied above or around their man boobs (as aposed to around their waist), a little dog called Bill that chased me and a fucking snake that jumped at me from the grass!
All in all it was a good ride. So many entertaining riders.
Any other comical sighting for the day, ABD or other wise?

Spotted many zip ties. Pipe cleaners in a host of colours also very popular. Even I was going a little fluoro-blind.

One thing I laughed at (although you probably had to be there) - with that sea of vulnerable wobbly riders to pick from the lone magpie I saw on the ride (by the rest stop in Altona) was givin’ some to the ONLY pedestrian for miles around - weak prick bird :evil:.

The St John Ambulance First Aid center down there seemed oddly busy, but for the life of me I couldn’t see what the punters had wrong with them.

I did the 100k ATBIAD (Sorrento -> Melbourne) with my infrequent cyclist mate Chris (who did a top job on absolutely no preparation btw) and my pick of the day was a guy we saw in the carpark at Sorrento.

To get to Sorrento you have to rock up to the Arts Centre, take off your pedals and rotate your handlebars 90 degrees and then you chuck your bike in the back of a semi trailer. Then you jump in a bus, get off in Sorrento, find your bike and stick the pedals back on and fix the bars.

This one guy had set his bike up and was riding around pulling up on the bars and swerving all over the place as if the handling was all wrong or something. You could see he was like, “Man, something just doesn’t feel right! What is it?!” swerve swerve little mono brake swerve

He was still trying to work it out when one of the ride marshals, who were running around helping people, pointed out that he’d tightened the bars up ok but the front wheel and fork were 180 degrees backwards.


To be fair, it would have been an easy mistake to make when you’re in a hurry to get started and have never played with your bars before. I wonder how far to Melbourne he would have got if the marshal hadn’t have helped him out?

Gotta say I enjoyed the ride today - yeah there was noobs and silliness but everyone was having fun riding so who cares? It was a surprisingly fun and wholesome day out.

Oh, also saw a bunch of fixie bros and chicks too and got a couple of random comments and encouragements from some of our gearie cousins. At one point a guy rode up behind me and was like “Hey, fixie, that’s awesome man, good on ya, that’s really cool.” I said “Cheers!” and then as he went past I noticed that one of his legs had been amputated above the knee and he had a funky looking metal prosthesis clipped into the pedal.

Now that’s really cool.

It only to happen on the way to Geelong, total carnage. Then there was those damn tacks the bogans put on the road at Mornington… found three in my front tire, fixed that rode 100m found another one in the rear grrr.

Can someone enlighten me as to what putting all the cable ties into your helmet is for? In my travels about the city and beyond today I saw quite a few rocking this “fashion” statement

They’re a magpie swooping ‘avoidance’ device.

A magpie tends to swoop the highest point on a creature it’s attacking so the zip ties act as an artificial appendage that can be attacked without you losing skin to the bird.

Pity they look so silly… but I must admit that a recent commute route of mine had a vicious magpie on it and I was very tempted to add them to my helmet… that and a pair of false eyes on the top too…

I dont get it though… arnt helmets there to protect your head in the first place?

It’s a secret street racing club. If you beat someone, they are obliged to give you a cable tie. Those guys who rock 30+ cable ties, they are the elite. Gods amongst men.

yeah i saw a dude with like 50+ he was like 60 and in high-vis, i think he’s the one they call the king pin

to stop crows swooping…

thats awsome idea i was goin to got with a old pair of sunnies in the back of the helmet

Yes, and every traffic light is a stage win…

ahhh well i might head to dick smiths at lunch time and but a 250 pack of ties, put everyone of them on my helmet and strike some fear into their lycra covered souls!

Yes, and every traffic light is a stage win…

Actual LOL


Is THAT what all those antennae on the Longhorn adorned, bogan cars are for? They’re glorified cable ties? Elite bogans? (Now that’s an oxymoron… :|) Might explain why they always want to take me out at lights…

Cable ties are to the pensioners, what spoke cards are to the hipsters.

+1 lol