karl… u were the biggest influence in my entire life! i write to you now having been plagued with the images from ur memorial service… dont take this the wrong way but i dont know whether im gonna be huggin you, or beating the shit outta you, the next time we meet…
u were the brother i always wanted… but because of our father, u were the brother i never had… i’ve sub-consciously been basing my entire life around what would make u proud… well here it is bro, im a kickass deejay… a kickass bartender… and most of all, im a kickass human being… and im happy… i just wish i had the chance to share some of my love with you…
i’ve been seaching for u on facebook atleast once a week for the past two years, hoping that you would show up… i heard fi (as u liked to call her) say that ur facebook name was karl dibson or something as a joke… i wonder what both of our lives had been like had i been able to get in contact with you before you made the decision you made… i have saved many of my friends from the point of despair that i truely believe that i could have helped you, i am a ball of energy willing to help those who need it, like you, who needed it, but now its too late…
i miss u karl, i really do… and judging by the sound of the people on this blog, and the amount of people that turned up to say their farewells, u were more loved than you will ever know… i just can’t believe you’re gone…
you were a champion at everything you ever did… skating, soccer, cylcing, surfing, lawn bowls (thats right i remember) and im sure the list could go on for hours… haha remember that time u took me to that skatepark next to the old amazons water park… u tried to teach me how to ‘drop in’ on a skateboard… epic fail! but regardless of how grazed my arms and elbows were by the end of it, that was my fondest memory of you… or maybe it was the hand-brakies you did in that lil car you had when u were living with rudi (think it was yellow) shit man, they scared the shit out of me… yet funnily enough i wrote off 3 cars trying to replicate ur skills…
i cant stop thinking about what was going through ur head when u decided to do this… to have so much opportunity… to be surrounded by so much love… it just breaks my heart to even imagine the desperation you must have felt…
i know its only early but i dont think i will ever accept that this was ur time to go, however i take comfort in the fact that this was ur choice, and hope that ur decision had been well thought out…
this is the worst day of my entire life, i just cant believe that u are gone… i would trade anything for one more chat, one hug, or even just one word from you…
see you soon bro!
love you always and forever!
ur full brother todd!